Vine and pencil ✏️

 Freeze Trauma...that is the power of the cold weather in Chandigarh winters!  Minus one.....pluse 10....add 5...It is after all the most happening time for the winters.....with the attitude like ....".Frankly my dear I give a damn"...kind of  inspiration from Gone with the wind.

Winter blues???? Greens do appeal too! What pencil can I use to write about this experience?

This season of the winter I couldn't resist the wine and the brandy.My favourite one....Morphis. But nothing can beat the Ahhhhh feeling of coffee Rum  from Goa. I actually forget if coffee is more interesting or... Rum. Jack Sparrow says ,Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing too if you  only have a little. The impact of understanding the behavior... Addiction, trauma, alcoholics... And that too anonymously? Wow. Gabor Maté writes The attempt to escape from pain, is what creates more pain. Not all addictions are rooted in abuse or trauma, but I do believe they can all be traced to painful experience. A hurt is at the centre of all addictive behaviours.

So to beat the weather I was having two spoons of brandy daily for the last 8-9 days. But I was alarmed  by my inner voice..... Addiction ho jayegi. I called my  Cousin. I'm sad. It was a very serious time..I 'm having brandy daily. It's very cold. My hands and feet are frozen. I'm avoiding it. But it's too cold. But not actually taking brandy. Rum  too. No. No. No. No. I just can't.

 There was a stony silence on the other side. I wondered if she is listening or has she disconnected .....or Both? 

So I went on and on with my inner dialogue...She ought to respect me. I'm elder to her... and  silently I was wondering.Did I narrate an essay on Myself to her, or did she  feel I'm discussing a potential counselling case? Both can co-exist.

Now..Deeps with all the fun in her heart and with ever ready plans to bully me... said Didi..Don't take Tension. I'll take you to Nasha Mukti Kendra and you are sorted. Now what to say, what not to say, what to think, what not to.

Some addictions are important and stimulating .....like...when some family members just want to have fun at your cost, The cost you pay the trip to Delhi. And if you can enter a few homes without even telling them you are on the way or coming and you just ring the bell, you know what these connections  are like and what these people mean to you.

There is no wine and no pencil that can give you a high as high as being with certain people.But such relationships...they're beyond the power and beyond the high.