Ouch to Aha!

Our wounds ....our wisdom! 

I walked into my Therapy room this morning, which is My Den to My Zen!!! The blank Thought Record sheet,which I usually share with my clients did not prompt any thoughts.

No thoughts, no mantra, no prayer.

The blankness and silence in the room were mesmerizing at that moment.

Tere mere beech mein kaisa hai yeh. Bandhan ....I asked myself.Usually this bond is of connection.Blank paper and me....lots to do...emotional catharsis....dooodle....sketch....etc etc.

 The voice within me instructed me to listen to my soul and then write something on the blank sheet.

The different column's for filling in situations, emotions, feelings, behaviors, thoughts, alternate thoughts.The orange colour boxes were quite fascinating in this sheet.I loved  the subtle orange color and.

The orange color actually also reminded me of the orange robes worn by the monks.And I always say about the orange robes.Oh, it's a lot of responsibility after all you are the  god's person and I think it's very tough to be that all the time because at the end of the day we're all dealing with something known as life

I reflected on a friend's message. Do you give yourself credit? Credit for how many wounds you have turned into wisdom? .....Ouch to Aha....I reflected on what is it that I've done in past few months.Yes, I have let go people I've cut off, blocked numbers.And how does it feel? It feels light.It feels liberated. It's actually a great comeback to your own self.And there are no fears, there is no analysis, no paralysis.Then I thought, can I alter this thought?

How many wisdoms I've turned into my wounds?I think we all do that when we know that there's something not right for us, but then we still get attracted to it. It could be a temptation to eat something. It could be a temptation to write , to talk to a person who's not right for us.

One thing that I struggle with is receiving..Even a cup of coffee.The fact is sometimes we've just been in the position of a giver.And at times I feel that this kind of behavior comes when some one has been carrying mountains of responsibility.And also climbing the mountains.

The giver has to balance the giving.Yes, that's one of my area of focus too. what is it that gives me balance every day.And what is it that throws me out of balance.Something that gives me balances when I say no to things.And something that throws me out of balance is when I have to say yes to something that I don't want to."I wore an orange robe to the party and everyone thought I was a Buddhist monk. I was just trying to make a fashion statement... or a statement about my love of citrus fruits." 

"Orange robes: because who needs a social life when you can have a spiritual one?"

Well I am conserving my energy.The Bhagavad-gita (13.11) states that solitude is a characteristic of knowledge.